Unknown Number

When 'unknown number' flashes up on the phone there are often a few different reactions that could run through a person's mind.

Should I answer?
Is it a cold call?
It might be important!
It could be my parents...

for me, especially since a false alarm call in September, 'Unknown Number' sent my heart to my throat pounding at a million beats a second. 

It could be another call. 

I'd had a few 'Unknown Number' calls since the first false alarm and most had provoked this reaction. Mostly, they were calls from the hospital arranging appointments or calls from my parents who have a withheld phone number!

At 00:02 on 29th October 2015, my phone buzzed under my pillow. 

Unknown Number.

There was no doubt about this one. 

I answered as calmly as I could, trying to sound as normal as possible. Obviously receiving a potentially life-changing call in the middle of the night requires utmost normality. I listened to the familiar, calming voice at the other end telling me that there could be a match and I needed too get myself ready. I would get another call shortly to let me know how long the ambulance would be. 

I phoned Mum and Dad. Dad answered. 

'Take two', I said.

'Take two what?' was the response... I made it a bit clearer. Dad had just come in from the pub from his guitar club night. Given that the false alarm call had seemed pretty relaxed and had taken over 8 hours from phone call to being sent home, Mum and Dad chose to get some sleep before making their way up.

The transplant co-ordinator called back to say that the ambulance would be with us in an hour and a half. I had a bath, took my time, tided the house and made an attempt to relax. 

Fast forward a few hours and Caius and I are at the Royal Free. Mum and Dad are on the way. 

Keeping warm in Caius' Gilet

I spend most of the time telling myself and Caius that it's not going to happen but somehow things are different this time. We go through the same process of getting into the hospital gown, ECG, chest X-ray, blood tests (17 vials!), cannula. It took us a little longer to get to the hospital this time so the fact that things are moving a bit quicker doesn't seem to indicate much. They tell me I'll be going down at around 7am. Mum and Dad aren't that close but given that it's almost 7, it doesn't feel like I'll be in surgery soon. I'm given some temazepam (a tranquilliser) to calm the nerves. It sends me funny and then to sleep. It's gone 7 and people are talking about 8am being staff changeover time so I'll be heading down near then. Mum and Dad are close. They're nearly here. It's almost 8am and the bed is being wheeled somewhere. Caius is with me holding my hand. I think I was a bit teary by this point. I told Caius to tell Mum not to feel guilty for not making it. I loved them all and would see them soon.

Temazepam induced strangeness!

There were nurses beside me now, holding my hand and comforting me. Caius was there and the doors to theatre were opened. The bed was wheeled in and I had tears falling silently down my cheeks. I was terrified by this point. It was really happening. 10 to 14 hours of surgery lay ahead and who knew what would happen during or after that surgery.

I was slid onto a different bed for surgery. I was hooked up to a few monitors and the anaesthetic was given. Someone held and stroked my hand and comforted me the whole time, reassuring me that everything would be ok. I was asleep.

My pre-surgery tummy...